There is nothing in this world quite like a mother’s love. She charges nothing for the nine months she carries us while we are growing inside her, for all the nights she sat up with us, prayed for us, for everything from tying our shoelaces to helping us handle life's toughest and most unexpected moments, for all the trying times, all the tears we have caused her through the years, for the toys, food, clothes, changing of diapers, and even wiping our nose, and so on.
Mothers were made because God could not be everywhere. But in their blind love and concern for their children, they end up doing or saying funny things. Melodrama might as well be every mother’s middle name. To correct her child or to show her denial of our tantrums, a mom comes up with dialogues that are sarcastic, sentimental, angry, and sometimes cynical. These dialogues make us all believe that all moms are the same. Their mock anger or bitter-sweet taunts have been a large part of everyone’s childhood. Have a good laugh going through the below:
A Mother’s Superstitions
A mother’s superstitious side emerges as soon as she holds her newborn. Starting with "Kaala teeka" and "nazar utaarnaa" to not praising her child publicly, she is at her cautious best. Even at this age, whenever I'm not well, my Amma genuinely thinks someone has put a "Buri Nazar – evil eye" on me. She will do a special puja for me at the temple and tie a sacred thread on my wrist. At times, Amma uses mustard seeds with a pinch of rock salt and dry red chilies, rotating them around my head seven times and then burning them to ward off the “The Buri Nazar.” As per Amma, this ritual will destroy the negative energy, the ill effects of the evil eye, and bring me relief and a sense of lightness.
The Classic Dialogues
A mother’s favorite pastime is to compare children. Right from when we are born to our education and marriage, she cites examples of someone else who is doing better than us.
- Tere se acche toh padosi ke bacche hai (The neighbor’s children are better than you) - Try telling your mom that you don't want to go and buy groceries with her, and you will see your neighbor’s kid being a better son/daughter than you, even when he/she probably doesn't even exist. The famous dialogue that every typical mom utters is “Uske Beti/Bete ko Dekho.” (Look at their daughter/son) The achievement list of “Uske” daughter or son is always lengthy compared to ours.
- Zyada udne ki zaroorat nahi hai (No need to fly too high) - You got good marks on a test and talked to her as if you were Einstein? She will humble you down with this golden advice.
- Padhai likhai pe dhyan do! (Focus on your studies!) - This absolutely typical mother dialogue will show that those five minutes of playtime are too much in her eyes, even after you have studied long enough.
- Bhagwaan ke liye hi kuch karle (Do something for God’s sake) - From nursery school to even if you are working for NASA, mommies are never ever satisfied. The moment she sees you sitting idle, she will assume that you are doing nothing with your life and would somehow manage to get you off that couch.
Undeniable Support and Quirks
But I agree there are times when she believes in us. Whether it was our terrible school play performance or our slightly-less-terrible college presentation, nobody clapped louder or smiled prouder than our mothers. She is ready to tell the world that you are her blood and that your accolades are her inheritance.
One cough in the middle of the night and suddenly there's a warm hand on your forehead and a glass of honey-lemon water by your bedside. Even now as adults, when we are sick, we still wish for mom's magical healing touch.
The moment I settle in to watch my favorite show, my Amma suddenly remembers twenty urgent chores I need to do. But when her serials are on, even if the house is on fire, she will say, "Just let me see what happens to Tulsi next!" Also, Amma is a very big fan of mythological serials. But here, the big issue is she watches all the mythological serials—same episodes, repeat telecasts—in Hindi, Tamil, and Malayalam. I always argue with her that, in whatever language you watch, Ravan will kidnap Sita; the story won’t change. But all I get is a weird response: “Feel the depth, you won’t understand.”
Food and Nagging
No matter how many times I say to pack little food in the office lunchbox, it is always jam-packed with enough food to feed my entire office building. And God help me, if I dare to return with leftovers, Amma’s emotional, dramatic dialogue will be: “Isn’t my cooking good enough for you?”
At times, she is my Secret Santa. That extra chocolate or my favorite food sneaked into my lunchbox when I have a bad day—Amma always knows exactly what I need, sometimes before I know myself.
- Khana kha liya (Have you eaten?) - No matter what is happening in your life, this is the first question she will ask.
- Kitna Dubla Ho Gaya Hai (How thin you’ve become) - No matter how fatty you are, you will always be that “Skeleton” for your mom.
Motherly Wisdom and Tech Trouble
Every Indian household has that one drawer filled with plastic bags of various sizes and ages. "Don't throw that away! It's a good bag!" Never mind, even if it’s been there since your fifth birthday party—someday, somehow, it will be useful.
- Phone mein hi ghusa reh (Keep getting lost in your phone) or Mobile phone se puch lo (Ask your mobile phone) - How many times have you heard your mom utter this dialogue? Cell phones are perpetually every mom’s biggest enemy. Be it poor marks, being late for school or office, a headache, or just a low-mood day, moms do not hesitate to put the entire blame on mobile phones. Even if you have just picked up your mobile to check your emails or anything important, mommies are sure to give you a death stare. You name it and she will blame the phone for every mishap!
Destruction and Disobedience
- Tod de… ghar ke sare cheeze tod de (Break it… break everything in the house) - There is absolutely no forgiveness if you happen to bang some of the utensils in your kitchen. The simplest cling sound will trigger any mother into unleashing a series of dialogues which usually revolve around how you are about to break everything in the house because you are the clumsiest human being ever. The taunts from your mommy will only grow throughout the day!
- Kutta nahi ayega is ghar mein, tum kutton ko paal tho rahi hoon! (A dog will not come into this house, you are already raising dogs!) - Who has not had such an encounter with their moms regarding pet adoption? It is destined to be a failed mission no matter how old you are! Moms simply refuse to entertain their kids’ ideas of pet adoption. Be it a dog or a cat or a parrot, the answer to pet adoption is always a firm NO from our strict mommies!
- Yeh fashion hai? (This is fashion?) Perhaps the most relatable dialogue thrown at us by our mothers. Whether you are sporting a pre-stitched saree or a crop leather jacket, your mom is surely going to make a comment about your fashion sense. Log kya kahenge? (What will people say?) – That is her biggest fear. What will people say about short dresses or ripped jeans? What will they say about your spiky look and bike rides?
- Time pe ghar nahi aaye toh bahar hi sona (If you don’t come home on time, sleep outside) - How many times have you had to coax your mommy into letting you stay out a little while longer than the established curfew? This is the most classic statement made by our dearest mommies while responding to our request. There are often slight modifications to this dialogue, with the impending threat of involving Dad being one of the most prominent.
- Tumhare dost kuye mein kudenge toh kya tum bhi kudoge (If your friends jump into a well, will you too?) to Doston Ke Sath Reh Kar Bigad Gaya Tu (You've gone bad because you hang out with your friends) - Ask mom permission for a Lonavala trip, or even for a night-out plan, or to miss your school/college for a day with the reason that your friends are also doing it, and mothers will absolutely sum it up with this classic dialogue. You might never have an answer to this question. Mother always hates your friends. Whether you have diarrhea or fever or asthma, the reason will always be your friends. It’s a never-ending cycle.
The Wake-Up Call and The Search
Before smartphones existed, we had mom. Rain or shine, holiday or school day, mothers are always available to wake us up with the perfect combination of gentle nudges and increasingly loud calls. And somehow, she always knew exactly how much time we needed to get ready. Bed se bahar niklo, Koi 5 minute nahi chalega, Bistar se nikal ja, Nalayak! (Get out of bed, 5 minutes won't work, Get out of the bed, Useless!) Even if you beg your mom for those five extra minutes of sleep, she won’t let you have them. At times, when you wake up after 7 AM, she will throw a knowledgeable piece of advice cum dialogue: “Itni Jaldi Kyun uth gaye” (Why did you wake up so early?) – Now this does not mean what you think it means. When Amma tells this, it means you have committed the crime of waking up after morning hours. Never believe Amma when she wakes you up announcing a particular time: “It is already 10 AM.” She will wake you up at 7 AM saying that it is 10 AM, and the tone of 10 AM seems real. You spring up on your bed thinking that you are late, but then when you see the clock, you understand that it’s just another trick. If this trick doesn’t work, then she will switch off the fan in summer and switch it on in winter. Always remember this is a common way our mothers wake up everyone in the house after giving them a jolt of panic.
- Wahin to rakha hai (It's kept right there) - Now this is something no child has been able to decrypt so far. When Amma says something is there, it means it is your duty to find out where it is. It is very difficult to understand when she says, “waha usko hata kar, waha se woh de…” (Remove that from there, and give me that from there…) Kisko hatana hai? Kidar se? Kya dena hai? (Remove whom? From where? Give what?) No one can decode her words. You can never find something in an hour that your mother finds in a flash of a second. This is something which is beyond anyone’s understanding!
The Guilt Trip and Self-Importance
- Sharam hai ki Nahi tumko (Do you have any shame or not?) - Moms always want their kids to be obedient. Just one instance of disobedience and she won’t hesitate to question your values and manners.
- Bachpan se paal rahi hu tumhe (I have been raising you since childhood) - Her expert way to send you on a guilt trip. Try refusing to do something she asked, and you will know who has done everything for you since you were a kid.
- Galti to meri hi hai (It is my fault only) - This is the iconic statement by every mom when they give up explaining their kids and end up admitting sarcastically that it is their fault and nobody else’s.
- Jab main tumhare jitni thi, poora ghar sambhal leti thi (When I was your age, I used to handle the entire house) - Moms have a common complaint that their kids are not obedient and responsible enough to carry on with their responsibilities.
- Maa toh Maa hi rehti hai (A mother is always a mother) to Main kya tumhari personal assistant hoon (Am I your personal assistant?) to mere toh dus haath (ten hands) hai (I have ten hands) to mai nahi hoti toh is ghar ka kya hota (What would happen to this house without me?) to Main teri Maa hun ki tu meri Maa hai (Am I your mother or are you mine?) to Mai toh is ghar ki naukrani hu (I am a maidservant in this house) to Mai sab samajhti hu (I understand everything) - Never try outsmarting your mother. Moms like to remind us of their importance ALL THE TIME! From throwing clever dialogues like these, mommies really like to extract attention everywhere and every time.
Time, Tears, and Threats
- Tumharey Time Vs Humarey Time (Your Time vs. Our Time) - Why does every mom have a thought that their time was one of the happiest? That dialogue “Hamare Zamane Mein” (In our time) can bring a war between our generation and her generation. When she doesn’t have the right explanation, she manages to get away with “Because I said so!” No follow-up questions after that.
- Giving birth to you was perhaps the biggest mistake of my life - When you disappoint her badly, she will get all teary-eyed and utter this highly emotional dialogue in a broken voice. She may also mouth this dialogue in rage and in a loud voice. Both ways, she lets you know that you have done something wrong. It’s not just a dialogue; it’s totally emotional blackmailing. So, in such a case, you have no other better option than saying sorry for no reason. If five letters of the word “Sorry” can end the argument, then you should not waste your energy anymore.
- “Shaadi karlo sab theek ho jayega” (Get married, everything will be fine) - If you are in your late 20s, then probably every conversation with her will remind you that the solution to your problems is getting married.
- The times she doesn’t know how to react to mischief or you don’t listen to her, she uses her secret weapon: ‘I will tell papa’ or “Papa ko batau woh baat?” (Should I tell Dad about that?) or “Papa Ko Aaney Dho Aaj” (Let Dad come home today). Most terrifying line! When it comes to threatening kids, for most children, this is the worst scare they can have. If your mom needs you to do something and you don’t listen to her, you will know that she has some seriously secret things you did that she can always tell your father and screw you up. This tactic always works and definitely turns the aura into the scariest one.
- Kamse kam apna kamra hi saaf karle (At least clean your room) - We have all grown up listening to this dialogue, but in all honesty, did we actually keep our rooms clean (we all know the answer to that). Every alternate day, these are the kind words moms would say, and every alternate month, we would actually clean our mess.
The Mother’s Heart
- Kaha Ho Beta? Kab Aaoge Ghar (Where are you, son/daughter? When will you come home?) or You must come back home before it gets dark! - This dialogue actually shows how much she cares for you. No matter how much she scolds you, after all, she is your mom, who loves you in the same way, just like a filmy mother. Every mother has that filmy emotional spark that truly makes them the perfect Mother that we all need. As an unmarried girl, I don’t remember going out after sunset. Whenever I venture out during the day, one minute here and there and my mum till date frantically starts calling me to take updates about my whereabouts!
- Mothers take you to a relative’s house by convincing you with these words: “We will be staying there for 15 minutes only!” Never ever trust your mom on this.
- Sabse Sundar Lag Raha/ Rahi Hai (You look the most beautiful) - For every mom, her child is the most beautiful person on this planet. Without even looking at you, she will tell you that you look best.
The Timeless Question
- When Will You Grow Up? - She utters this dialogue out of frustration in any situation. When she finds you misbehaving with a relative, she will drag you to a corner and say this dialogue. When she finds your room in an utter mess, she will say this dialogue. In the kitchen, when you make a map of Australia in the name of a Roti, she will utter this dialogue again. Basically, all the times when you do not act your age, you may be at the receiving end of this dialogue. Well, at times when she sees you act like a mature person, her eyes fill up with tears of love and pride and she murmurs, “When did you grow up so much?”
Well, no matter how much your mom screams at you or how dramatic she is being, you know that she is the only person who stands by your side every time you need her the most. One of the most beautiful pleasures of a mother is watching her child smile, which heals every wear and tear of her heart.
No one can beat a mother's love. When you look into your mother's eyes, you know that is the purest love you can ever find on this earth. You may be a star for the world, but you are still a five-year-old child for your mom.
“A mother is she who can take the place of all others but whose place no one else can take.”
